TLV: Inbox

[tinstar]

Comments

1/?

[betacuck]

raylan hey

2/?

[betacuck]

we have an emergency situation going on

3/?

[betacuck]

life or death

4/6

[betacuck]

raylan pick up your phone

5/6

[betacuck]

i could be dying text me back

6/6

[betacuck]

you're supposed to be my sexy body guard come on its serious this time

[tinstar]

Jesus Christ, Roman, I think my phone is startin' to heat up. Take a breath. Or three.

ARE you dyin?

[betacuck]

I could be.

[tinstar]

You're not, not with that many messages. What do you need, Rome

[betacuck]

your hat.

[tinstar]

[Raylan discards text immediately at that and calls Roman up, sans video.]

You what??

[betacuck]

[ Over the top enunciation: ] Your hat.

Me, cackling at this

[tinstar]

Wha-.. Why??

[betacuck]

Because, Raylan, some people don't want to commit social suicide but still have a good time.

[tinstar]

Are you speakin' another language? I feel like you're speakin' another language. What does social suicide have to do with my hat? I thought it was garish.

[betacuck]

It is, it sucks and I hate it, but I need it just for tonight. Please? Where's that country bumpkin niceness you always have?

[tinstar]

You're askin' me for my second borne, that's where it's gone.

If I say yes, there's some promises you gotta make. This hat has value.

[betacuck]

Fine. It's just for Dorian's party, it's not like I'm going into space with it. I'm gonna need your flannel, too, by the way.

[tinstar]

I- Yo-?

Are you goin' as a cowboy motherfucker? To the Halloween party? [There was a hint of laughter behind the declaration, like he couldn't believe this was a possibility.]

[betacuck]

[ Roman's eyes narrow suspiciously even though they can't be seen. He can Feel that laughter, jerk. ]

I'm not gauche enough to show up and then put on a pair of provided cat ears, and there's no way I'm trying too hard or putting in any effort. It's a delicate balance and I have a reputation to uphold.

So.

Hat.

[tinstar]

Is that cause of the pussy jokes or because you'd be cute as hell to everyone else in cat ears. [It wasn't really a question.]

Fine; but you have to swear it's gonna come back without stains or burns or.. nothin' else. Like I said, second born. Do you swear? Like, on pain of death? I've had this hat for longer than you've been an adult.

[Not strictly true in any sense, but completely true in his heart.]

[betacuck]

[ we're gonna just completely ignore the cute with cat ears joke goddammit ]

I fully realize this hat is your only friend in existence but you know it's just a hat, right?

[tinstar]

You don't understand our relationship, clearly, and you're overlookin' my love of my gun...

[He sighs.]

I'm not sayin' yes until you swear. [Ya know, like a child.]

[betacuck]

Are you serious?

[tinstar]

You're lucky I don't make you sign a NDA. Yes I'm serious. The flannel ain't a problem but the hat is insured.